Meet me in the middle.

''Take a seat right over there, sat on the stairs, stay or leave. The cabinets are bare and I'm unaware of just how we got into this mess, got so aggressive I know we meant all good intentions...

So pull me closer, why don't you pull me close? Why don't you come on over? I can't just let you go.

Oh baby, why don't you just meet me in the middle? I'm losing my mind just a little, so why don't you just meet me in the middle?''

Ever found yourself in this situation? When good intentions got you more trouble then they did good? I swear I feel like I am losing my mind. Nothing makes sense anymore. Except that one thing, the one ''thing'' I don't have. I don't do sappy love songs or grand romantic gestures, romance in movies makes me gag really but what can you do when someone does something as romantic for you as John Cusack did in Say Anything with that boom box?

Sometimes I feel all the damn feelings again, they hit me like a huge yellow school bus. Memories. Feelings. That one feeling when I can almost feel his touch, his hug, his arms around me. His lips on mine. That feeling where he just consumes me and everything around me is him. The air I breathe, every sound, every look. Every single thing is just him. It comes to a point where I just can't take it.

I am so scared of forgetting, how he made / makes me feel. The sexy cocky confident dance on stage, how it made the breath stuck in my throat. How he sang ''Don't cry'' with his eyes locked on mine for the entire five minutes of the song and it felt like we were the only two people on the planet. I am so scared of forgetting that moment when he's suddenly on his knees in a bar full of people, most of them his really close friends, just to prove a point to me. A point that love can be forever and it can be happy and it can be a fairytale. But there's no space for our fairytale in this world.

A hug sounds so simple, feeling safe in someone's arms sounds so simple but the feeling of being in your lovers arms is anything but simple. In all the hell I've been through lately, all the pain, all the heartache. I realised that the only comfort I need / want in my life, the only thing that could actually make the world right again is him. The only man that I can imagine my future with, few years down the line. Jobs, place of our own, an entire zoo and maybe a couple of kids. I thought about it just last week and then I got to the point where I just stopped thinking because it hit me like a big god damn sack of bricks, I can't plan a future if he aint in it?

And let me tell you something that is the worst kind of pain one can feel. Smoking and drinking will kill you in twenty plus years but loving someone that is out of reach, not right for you, not returning your love back, or whatever else, that will kill you daily. No need to drink or smoke. Distance makes the heart grow fonder is true. I learned that now. The further apart we are the more I want him here with me.

''Looking at you I can't lie just pouring out admission, regardless my objection and it's not about my pride, I need you on my skin just come over, pull me in, just...

Baby, why don't you just meet me in the middle? I'm losing my mind just a little, so why don't you just meet me in the middle?''