Do you know that I've been to Florence and I never saw Michelangelo's David? Safe from a copy that's outside. And do you know that I've been to Milan countless times and I NEVER EVER saw the Last supper? And you know what else? It's fucking killing me. Literally killing me every single damn day. Michelangelo and Da Vinci are (next to Bernini and Botticelli and Tizian and Caravaggio and about two hundred others lol) two of my absolutely favourite artists and though I've seen their work (nearly sobbed over them too lol) I've never seen these two which are only the most important works of art in my book. Except of course Laocoon which to me is the hight of absolute beauty and nothing will ever top that. I had to be literally by force pulled away from it, lol, there I stood rooted at the spot staring at it, examining every single detail, muscle, vein, expression, the terror frozen on their faces, the bodies of the two snakes, the vicious agression in their attack, the fabric looking like it's real fabric, spilling down from the marble, everything is just amazing. As a whole. There is nothing quite as perfect on this planet as is that frozen moment that Laocoon depicts. Not Da Vinci's work or Michelangelos but of course you guys know that. (There's a picture on my insta if you wanna check it out, or punch ''Vatican'' as the side search bar here. You're welcome.)
Some fun facts about senior Da Vinci, beacuse honestly I feel we are very much alike in so many ways. Did y'all know that he was a huge huge animal lover and chose to be a vegetarian? That was really unusual in his time, well I sometimes feel it still is because the way some people look at me sometimes…sigh. Nothing I love more than when I ask for something ''can I get that without meat?'' and people go ''what the hell would you want that for?'' lol. Leo said that his body ''will not be a tomb for living beings'' and would buy animals on the markets so he could set them free. I learned recently that my first desire to not eat animals came when I was like four years old. Of course my parents didn't respect that. Of course. Instead they lied to me that animals don't really die and that it's fine. I was a kid what did I know. Second time I was older, about ten years old and honestly I fought my family for two years before they caved and let me eat what I wanted. Partly because I was apparently ''annoying'' and they wanted to stop the arguments and partly because they assumed ''oh it's a whim she'll get over it''. And look at me about seventeen years later. Still here. Still not eating dead bodies. This is a personal opinion btw, before I get attacked again, I don't care what other people do. This was my choice and I can't stand being bitched at for it. You eat what you want and I eat what I want and there's that, show some mutual respect. Please, because if I have to hear the ''teeth argument'' again I will fucking scream.
Did you also know that Da Vinci was struggling with the perfectionists disease? Like me. I drive myself mad if my drawing is not exactly as I want them to be. Which in turn means that I drive myself crazy A LOT. When painting the Last supper, Leonardo realised that the ceiling was too low on the painting and should the apostoles stand their heads would bump the ceiling. So, while the other artists the ''help'', thought that's no big deal because at the end of the day, the painting is frozen, the apostoles can't stand, it drove Leonardo crazy, he said he'd never sleep, he said he could never un-see it. And I am the same. It drives me crazy. I can't get things like that out of my mind. At all. I end up ripping up a lot of sketches just like Leonardo ended up repainting the ceiling and making it higher.
A chronic procrastinator. Sigh. Yes. That is literally me. And the fact that his reason for that was too many interests, which pulled him away from his art…well that's me too. Or used to be back when life was normal, always some music to listen to, always a new book to get lost in, always some new things to discover. Always something to learn, and in turn my art, which ironically I love above all else suffers. Sometimes I just like him just have trouble to focus on one thing, or just trouble focusing at all.
Leo faced a tough time after his wealthy father died and he basically fought over his inheritance with his siblings. Sigh. Haven't I been there before. Family. The one that blood ties you to is is the worst.
You know what's the one thing on a portrait I feel I can never get right? The lips. And you know what else? It is said that he spent ten years, TEN! Just to paint Mona Lisa's lips. Holy hell! And then I complain over erasing parts of drawings twenty times over. Remind me to shut up next time I say a smile or someone's lips don't look right.
Completely unrelated but did you know that his painting ''Salvator Mundi'' was sold for 450 million dollars and is the highest paid work of arts in history? I mean that…shit that is a lot of money. Makes sense it's one of THE Da Vinci's works, there are probably less than 20 paintings that exist today, I mean procrastinator and all…but still that is such a high number it makes my head spin.
So Leonardo was a great musician, he loved music and for a while he was actually best known as a musician. I think I don't need to elaborate on that more right? Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I'd focus on a musical career and actually put music before traditional art. I mean I was never that drawn to it, loved it but not really wanted to do it…I don't know, I guess I'm spinning in circles and I always come to that one true love. Traditional art.
I was on this exhibition in Rome in 2019? I think. Don't hold me to it, my whole concept of time has been thrown out the window. But that's besides the point anyways, the point is that I always found Da Vinci amazing, as an artist, as an inventor, as a man way beyond his time. A genius. I wish I was more like him in things that matter rather then just the superficial likness but then again even just slight similarities to a genius are pretty cool. As was the exhibition, it was mostly his inventions and some you really couldn't believe. Such an amazing mind. Shit I wish I could attend more of these. More in general. More as in being able to go see them. Sigh. Dying for those magic words ''ladies and gentlemen, this is your pilot speaking…'' and all that coming from me, who is deathly afraid of flying. My grandfather, a war pilot, is probably turning in the grave each time I say I'm afraid of flying.
And why am I rambling in the first place? (That whole have no concert write ups to talk about aside) The entire time I'm sitting here marveling at surreal beauty of these ancient pieces of art. The delicate way someone's facial expresion is carved or painted, the way their muscles are exactly right, nothing even a bit out of proportion, the way David's veins flow up his arm…the entire time I'm thinking about such perfection…there's only one face in my mind. Btw I did try to sketch these famous works of art before, I could never get it right, I lack the genius to do that, but that aside, the face that is always on my mind when studying perfection, is nothing short of perfect. The perfect golden ratio, eyes with lashes so perfect, lips full and with a curve Venus herself had to paint. A smile that would make Michelangelo's David blush. The jaw line, sharp to cut wood with, and makes you wanna run your fingers along those sharp lines. His face makes me feel like a blind man dying to ''read'' every curve, every line, every slight imperfection that make him more human. He makes me feel like dying in the desert and he's the first drop of rain. He makes me feel like there is magic out there, perfection, beauty, don't give up you'll find it. You know that feeling? I hope you do, or that you will. Everyone deserves that feeling at least once in their life. Truth is we need to learn how to love more, love each other, love ourselves, love life and love itself, love music, art, poetry, because lets face that is the only real beauty in this fucked up world. Art and love are the only things giving it meaning, but you know I get it, it's easy to hate, but so damn difficult to love.
Now if you'll excuse me, the pouring rain is making me really, REALLY miserable, the fact that this summer might actually end up being the worst summer in my life isn't making things better, so there's a few blank sheets of paper on my desk and brand new, super sharp pencils, fun fact, nothing makes me quite as turned on as sharp, perfect, new pencils…so I'll be sketching the perfect face etched in my brain, who knows, maybe I show you a sketch or two….
Cheers. Happy Monday.
No comments:
Post a Comment