''Everybody raise your glass, pick it up and throw it back,
grab ahold of your honey…
And everybody get a little lovin', a little touchin', a
little kissin' and a huggin', do a little lovin', a touchin', a little kissin'
and a huggin'.''
- Kip Moore / Wild Ones
How are we feeling today guys? On this lovely consumer
driven and trivial interpretation of love day.
I think if I scroll back through the years of my blogging
experience, there are quite a ''few'' posts on how much I actually don't like
Valentines day. It's like a filler song on a record, created to breach a lull
in holidays and make sure consumers keep busy spending money they don't really
have on items that die the next day or items nobody really needs. I was always
convinced that men that actually remember Valentines day aren't romantic but
guilty. Guilty of whatever, cheating, not paying their partners enough
attention, being crappy partners, remembering their other half only on that one
day in the year. Can we maybe remember
our special someone on any other random Tuesday, with flowers, with a random
card, with a chocolate bar, a vinyl or I don't know spark plugs for all I care,
whatever it is that floats your boat, just because, you know, you love that
person and you really don't need February 14th to show them that.
I think society and popular culture and mostly social
media really puts insane pressure on everyone, making it the strangest thing on
the planet that you're not into celebrating a fake holiday. Not to mention all
the expectations that are too damn high. Uhm, last time I checked there are no
''we just started dating, no idea where the fuck we're at yet, but here's a card
anyway''? or maybe ''thank you for being a fantastic hookup, cheers!''. I guess not everybody is into hopless
romantic type thing.
What I hate more is the cliche things we are told we need
to be happy. Dinner reservations, watching sappy couples all over eachother. Yuck,
I may vomit over the first course having to watch the fake displays of love
when usually things are a hell of a lot different behind closed doors. Flowers?
Flowers are so fucking expensive and they die. They DIE! Tacky heart shapped
chocolates and teddy bears,…oh my god, you don't see it but I am rolling my
eyes all the way back into my skull. Here's a little hint boys. No woman wants
a tacky red present that looks like you picked it up at the last moment at the
gas station on the way home. Women mostly want attention, so spending a nice
evening with her is far better. But if we're on about gifts…it doesn't have to
be sappy, it doesn't have to be red, and it doesn't have to be tacky. For a
change, get her something you know she wants, a CD of her favourite band,
tickets to see said band, a piece of clothing she told you she liked, makeup, a
bottle of god damn Jack Daniels. Whatever really, just something that was
obviously thought about. If I get a bit NSFW. How about lingerie? Present for
the both of you and you save money on dinner? Just asking.
I gotta say the flying babies and candy hearts are kinda
nauseating to me. Is there anyone who sells black and gray candy hearts that
say ''not you'', ''fuck off'', ''you suck'', ''not a chance'', ''as if'', ''how
about no'',…? I actually also heard that original candy hearts taste
disgusting. We don't have them in Europe so I have no idea but if that's the
case…I mean tacky and awful? Yuck.
The bragging about who has the best boyfriend. Ugh. Do you
really think that because he got you chocolate covered strawberries and a
bottle of expensive champagne in a hotel room service type situation makes him
the best boyfriend? Girl he just wants some ass. Let me tell you what a good
boyfriend is. And this is a true story. This girl thought she's spending
Valentines day alone, and she didn't mind because just like me she couldn't
care less. So at the last minute her boyfriend tells her that he'll cancel his
work obligations and instead of celebrating they'll fly out to meet his family.
Okay. Why not. Only when they got to the airport he took her to the wrong gate
and instead of flying to some Southern state, they flew to Los Angeles so she
got to see her favourite band play. That
my friends is a good boyfriend. And he'd be just as much of a good boyfriend if he'd order pizza and they'd watch a marathon of her favourite tv show on Netflix.
Pupular fun fact, chocolate in a heart shaped box doesn't
actually taste any better. Just get me normal chocolate, any day, all the time.
Do I need to even start with engagements? You guys! The tacky
engagments with rings in champagne glasses and inside deserts. Ughhh. Can I
start screaming? That's gotta be a sure way to choke or break a tooth? I mean,
I know it would happen to me as sure as I'm about to trip over my cat someday
and choke on a spoonfull of Nutella…
And another thing which I dislike about this so called
''holiday'' is that it's purely sexist. Everything revolves around women, the
roses, the candy, the bears, the engagements, the chocolate…but have you ever
saw a commercial or whatever else promoting gifts women can buy for their other
half? Surely women don't give men roses. I mean of course, they can apply the
same logic with CD's and spark plugs I mentioned above but really, generally
speaking, this is a highly sexist holiday. And in turn, too many men think that
a bunch of roses or a fancy dinner is a free pass into your panties. Oh.my.god.
Don't confuse my dislike towards this day for bitterness
and jealousy, please. It's far from that. Because generally, I feel that showing love is
important, to your partner, kids, pets, family, friends, love in the form of
kindness towards strangers, love in the form of acceptance towards others,
mainly those different from us. But guys, love all the time, everyday. Spoil your
loved ones when you can. Tell them often that you love them. Pet and feed a
stray. Do a little selfless kind act for someone else, who may not be as
blessed as you are. Life is so fucking short and so fucked up that a lil lovin'
is the least we can do on a daily basis.
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